My Girlfriend's birthday is the last weekend in September. Being the anal-retentive planner that I am, I started planning the big event in June and bought her gift (the major one) on Saturday at Tiffany's.
You might be asking, "Koog, why Tiffany's? That store is so sophisticated and classy and decidedly not you" Let me explain. In preparation for purchasing, I scoured the internet for the perfect gift. I looked at Celtic, platinum, custom and any other kind of jewelry you can think of. Before throwing up my hands and heading to Home Depot, I checked out Tiffany. Lo and behold, they had cool stuff at not too ridiculous prices. I looked at the site and found some rings that I thought she'd like, vetted them to my friends that have taste and was excited see them in the store.
So I, along with a trusted pair of advisors (my Ex and my Neighbor) went to Tiffany's to buy for a ring for the Girlfriend. I need to bring advisors because I suck and I know it, and this girl is special and deserves something better than a Home Depot gift certificate or an American Chopper t-shirt.
After exchanging niceties with the large security guard at the door, we head to the left (cheap) side of the store in search of the perfect gift. I immediately find the one I liked on the internet. It's so not right for her. Not sophisticated enough. After making the very nice sales lady take nearly every ring out of the case, I finally decided on one and my pair of advisors (both of whom had already told me to look at this particular design) agreed that this was perfect for the Girl.
After a struggle to part with my Check Card, I gave it to the sales lady and she wrapped up my Girl's gift.
Now, I realize that I have over a month and a half before the birthday to hang on to this gift. Oh no, this is not good. I have no self control. When I got home, I looked at myself in the mirror and said "Self, you have to stay strong. Don't give in to the instant gratification of immediate gift giving. You're better than that." After that firm but inspiring inner monologue, I felt invincible, completely in control.
With my new found arrogance and control, I put the blue bag in my car. Mocking my prior lack of discipline, I picked her up from work and took her home.
I'm so in control, I bring the bag in her house, mocking the temptation to deliver early.
Oh no, what's this? I look in her eyes and she melts my resolve. Could she know what I have with me? I did not expect this type of underhanded attack! Oh God, she's still looking at me. While talking to me about a seemingly innocuous topic, I'm deafened by the undertone of the conversation. Taunting me, with the account of her day, I am defeated.
The blue bag that I put before her made her laugh. She called me a loser for not being able to wait. Pretending she didn't launch an attack worthy of shock and awe on my army of self control.
She unties the white bow and tries to play it cool. I can tell she's excited. The cover comes off, the pouch opens and... She loves the ring! She mocks me for my lack of discipline. I smile and tell her I want her to have it for her vacation.
Immediately the ring is residing on her finger. I take a deep breath and smile to my self.
Later that evening, I got an e-mail from her with the following message: "I love my ring!"
You might be asking, "Koog, why Tiffany's? That store is so sophisticated and classy and decidedly not you" Let me explain. In preparation for purchasing, I scoured the internet for the perfect gift. I looked at Celtic, platinum, custom and any other kind of jewelry you can think of. Before throwing up my hands and heading to Home Depot, I checked out Tiffany. Lo and behold, they had cool stuff at not too ridiculous prices. I looked at the site and found some rings that I thought she'd like, vetted them to my friends that have taste and was excited see them in the store.
So I, along with a trusted pair of advisors (my Ex and my Neighbor) went to Tiffany's to buy for a ring for the Girlfriend. I need to bring advisors because I suck and I know it, and this girl is special and deserves something better than a Home Depot gift certificate or an American Chopper t-shirt.
After exchanging niceties with the large security guard at the door, we head to the left (cheap) side of the store in search of the perfect gift. I immediately find the one I liked on the internet. It's so not right for her. Not sophisticated enough. After making the very nice sales lady take nearly every ring out of the case, I finally decided on one and my pair of advisors (both of whom had already told me to look at this particular design) agreed that this was perfect for the Girl.
After a struggle to part with my Check Card, I gave it to the sales lady and she wrapped up my Girl's gift.
Now, I realize that I have over a month and a half before the birthday to hang on to this gift. Oh no, this is not good. I have no self control. When I got home, I looked at myself in the mirror and said "Self, you have to stay strong. Don't give in to the instant gratification of immediate gift giving. You're better than that." After that firm but inspiring inner monologue, I felt invincible, completely in control.
With my new found arrogance and control, I put the blue bag in my car. Mocking my prior lack of discipline, I picked her up from work and took her home.
I'm so in control, I bring the bag in her house, mocking the temptation to deliver early.
Oh no, what's this? I look in her eyes and she melts my resolve. Could she know what I have with me? I did not expect this type of underhanded attack! Oh God, she's still looking at me. While talking to me about a seemingly innocuous topic, I'm deafened by the undertone of the conversation. Taunting me, with the account of her day, I am defeated.
The blue bag that I put before her made her laugh. She called me a loser for not being able to wait. Pretending she didn't launch an attack worthy of shock and awe on my army of self control.
She unties the white bow and tries to play it cool. I can tell she's excited. The cover comes off, the pouch opens and... She loves the ring! She mocks me for my lack of discipline. I smile and tell her I want her to have it for her vacation.
Immediately the ring is residing on her finger. I take a deep breath and smile to my self.
Later that evening, I got an e-mail from her with the following message: "I love my ring!"
NICE!
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